Food For Thought

It's simply magical the way Nature's diuretic, the grapefruit, is in season during my peak wine-consuming season.  Coincidence or the Magic of the Holiday Season balancing everything out?

I've been finding some really great Oro Blanco grapefruits at the farmers' markets lately.  They're sweeter than regular grapefruit, and a whole lot prettier.  If you can find pomelos, even better.

Pour yourself a glass of sauv blanc and giddy-up!

OK, let's do this:

Grapefruit and Avocado Salad
serves 2
total time 10 min

1/2 T olive oil
1/2 T red wine vinegar
1/2 T shallot, minced really small
salt & pepper, to taste

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2 large grapefruit, supremed (look at you using your new skills!)
1/2 large avocado peeled, sliced

Combine the first group of ingredients and toss over the grapefruit and avocado.

Arrange artfully on a plate using a slotted spoon so it's not swimming in dressing and grapefruit juice.  Top with chopped cilantro or parsley.

Eat it and cancel out last night's wine.

Beet It! Just Beet It!

Well darlings, Thanksgiving is over so that means it's salad time until we all drop the 3lbs we gained over the weekend.  I'm saying "we" because you guys gained that much, too, right?  RIGHT?!

OK, let's do this:

Beet Salad with Orange and Fennel
makes 6 servings
prep time 2 min, total time 30 min-ish

1 bunch beets, any color, leaves & stems removed
1 t orange zest
1 navel orange
1/4 c balsamic vinegar
2 T olive oil
salt & pepper, to taste
6 handfuls lettuce
1/2 small fennel bulb, sliced thinly on your awesome new slicer
handful of goat cheese, optional

Bring a pot of water to a boil and boil the beets until fork tender (cooking time will vary based on how big the beets are).  Once they're done, run them under some cold water and slip the skins right off.  It's fun!  And slimy!  Cut into bite-sized chunks and set aside to cool.

Meanwhile, zest the orange and set the zest aside.

Next you're going to supreme the orange.

You: "What!  I don't know what the hell that means!"
Me: "Chill out, freak."

All supreming means is that you're going to get all the pith (white part) and peel off the citrus sections.


Here's how:
Cut the top and bottom off with a sharp knife.  Put a flat side down on the cutting board and use the knife to cut the peel and pith off, top to bottom.  You'll lose a little pulp, but if you work in small sections you can minimize it.

Next you're going to hold the peeled orange in one hand over a bowl and carefully cut between the membranes to remove just the yummy pulp section with no membrane or white stuff.

Congratulations!  You're a Supreme Stud(-ette)!

Pour the juice that was collected in the bowl into a small pot or pan and add the vinegar and zest.  Bring to a simmer and reduce to about 1/3 the original amount. Remove from the heat and set aside.

You just made balsamic/orange reduction!!


Now toss the beets,  orange sections, fennel slices and lettuce in the olive oil, salt & pepper.  Arrange in a little pile on a plate and drizzle with the balsamic/orange reduction.  Sprinkle with goat cheese if using (I wasn't, but only because I didn't have any).

Bonus points:  chop a little of the fennel greens and sprinkle on.

Today's lessons that apply to other recipes:
Making a reduction
Supreming citrus

You have learned so much today!  Go have a glass or six of wine - you've earned it.

Dear Lanie J-

When I get invited to potlucks I usually just stop and buy some bean dip from Trader Joe's and call it a day.  But this is Thanksgiving - The Big One.  I need to step up my game.  I also need to not work very hard.  What do I do?

Best,
Hopelessly Lazy

--------------------------

HL-

First off - You're BUYING bean dip?!  Sweet Smoking Baby, you people are worse than I thought.  We'll rectify that next week. As far as Thanksgiving goes, I've got your back.  You can actually make this recipe at the party in about 3 minutes.

Stay easy,
Lanie J



OK, let's do this:

Green Beans with Lemon
total time: 2 min

green beans
fresh lemon juice
olive oil
salt, to taste

Bring a large pot of water to a boil.  Add the green beans and cover.  The very second it starts to boil again, time 90 seconds.  No more.

Take the beans out of the water right away and toss in a little olive oil, lemon juice and salt.

That's it.  I'm not even measuring this one out for you, that's how much I trust you.

 

Email your cooking questions to CookStupidEasy@gmail.com

Uh-oh Spaghetti Squash-io!

I knew I shouldn't have joked about having a warm November.  Now the high is only 61º here in LA and I have to roast stuff at 425º just to keep from getting frostbite.

OK, Let's do this:


Spaghetti Squash with Garlic Butter
Makes 4 servings
Hands on time 10 min, cook time 40 min


1 Spaghetti squash, cut lengthwise, seeds removed
3 T olive oil, divided
3 T butter (keep it vegan by using only olive oil
2 handfuls cherry tomatoes, cut in half
handful of basil, chopped
3 cloves garlic, minced
salt, to taste

Preheat oven to 425ºF.  Drizzle the squash flesh with 1T olive oil.  Place the squash cut side down on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper and roast for 40 min or until flesh is tender.

Meanwhile, heat remaining oil in a large saute pan over low/med heat.  Cook the tomatoes and half of the basil for a few minutes, then add the garlic and butter and cook for another 10min, stirring frequently to avoid burning the butter and garlic.

Today's lesson that applies to other recipes:

Garlic and butter burn easily.  Add them later than other ingredients and use lower heat.

Once the squash is cool enough to handle with a towel, scrape the flesh out with a fork.  It will come off in spaghetti-like strands (get it?).

Toss the squash in with the butter sauce and salt to taste.  Garnish with remaining basil leaves.

I don't have kids because they're grody, but I can't help but think this would be a good alternative to regular noodles with butter (which is also grody).

Curry Deviled Eggs

Must...fight...urge...to...make...smelly jokes!

Seriously though, this dish is a simple yet impressive twist on a real crowd pleaser.

OK, let's do this:

Curry Deviled Eggs
Makes 24 pieces
Hands on time 10 min, total time 25 min

12 eggs
1/2 cup mayo
2 T mustard
1 T shallots, minced small
3 T celery, minced small
2 T pickle, minced small or pickle relish
1/4 t cayenne
1/2 T curry powder
salt and pepper, to taste

1 zip-loc baggie

Boil the eggs for 12 minutes, then set in a bowl of ice water. Once cooled, peel the eggs and slice lengthwise.

Pop the yolks into a bowl and combine with remaining ingredients.  Use a fork to mash it up really, really well - it should be smooth.  Ideally you should put it in your fabulous little food processor.  What?!  You didn't buy it yet?!  That's just insane.

Take the plastic baggie and cut a teensie piece of the corner off.  Congratulations!  You just made a pastry bag!  Fill the bag with the yolk mixture and gently squeeze it into the egg white halves.

Wanna Make it FANCY?!

If you take nothing else from this blog, remember this:

ARUGULA ALWAYS MAKES IT FANCY.

Place a few arugula leaves on a plate.  Put the deviled egg on the arugula.  Drizzle with a little olive oil and sprinkle with paprika.  If you get any fancier you'll have to start cooking with elbow length black satin gloves.  Even you, Jamil.

Thinking of taking these to a Thanksgiving potluck?  Here's a trick:
Stick a short glass or bowl over one of the eggs to keep plastic wrap from sticking to the other eggs.

Weekend Calorie Splurge: Sorbet With Berry Balsamic Topping

This splurge is not too indulgent calorie-wise.  Come to think of it, it does have balsamic vinegar in it.....let's just consider this one a salad.

OK, let's do this:

Balsamic Sorbet Topping
Total hands on time 8 min, chill time 5 min
makes about 6 servings


1/4 c balsamic vinegar
1 ish cup of frozen mixed berries
2 T maple syrup or agave nectar
1 cap full of vanilla (use the cap from the vanilla bottle)

Your favorite flavored sorbet (lemon, coconut or vanilla is awesome)

Combine all ingredients in a small pan over medium heat and simmer for about 10 minutes.  Allow it to chill in the freezer for a few minutes so it doesn't melt the sorbet.  Pour over sorbet.  Boom.  Done.

Change your life for less than $100

Once you figure out how to use this safely, the amount of time you'll save slicing carrots and cucumbers really thinly is totally worth the amount of time you'll spend bandaging your bloodied knuckles during the learning process.

Go! Buy it!

Quick Slice

$20 on Amazon plus shipping

Dear Lanie J-

Can you cook radishes?

-Jamil

Dear Jamil,

You can totally cook radishes, but just FYI, they're also really good raw. More specifically, raw with cold butter and sea salt.

But your desire to cook something that you could very easily just cut in half and call a dish leads me to think you're a bit of an overachiever - or a suck up.

For the record: I love suck ups.

This one's for you, Jamil!

Stay easy,

-Lanie J

OK, let's do this:

Jamil's Spicy Radish Stir Fry
makes 2 servings
prep time 5 minues, cook time 5 minutes



1/2 t orange zest
Juice from 1/2 of that orange (zest it first, trust me)
pinch crushed red pepper
1 clove garlic, minced
1/2 T minced ginger
2 green onions, sliced
1 T soy sauce
1 t sesame oil

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1 T olive oil
1 medium shallot, sliced thinly
1 handful of snow peas, sliced in half
1 small bunch of radishes, sliced thinly 
1 handful watercress, tough stems removed

Combine first group of ingredients in a bowl and set aside.

Heat the olive oil in a pan over med heat.  Add the shallots, snow peas and radish and sauté for 2 minutes.  Add the first group of ingredients and sauté for 2 more minutes.  Toss in the watercress and stir until wilted.

 

Email your cooking questions to CookStupidEasy@gmail.com

Sass-squash

The sweetness of this butternut squash soup is balanced by a kick of cayenne pepper and ginger.  It's kind of the Sookie Stackhouse of soup.


OK, let's do this:

Spicy Butternut Squash Soup
Makes 8-10 servings
Hands on time 20 minutes, cook time 45 minutes

1/4 t cayenne pepper
1/4 t ground cinnamon
1/4 t garam masala
1 T dried thyme
1 T dried sage
1/4 c olive oil


1 medium butternut squash
2 medium shallots diced
2 stalks celery, chopped
2 carrots, chopped
1 apple, cored and chopped
1 pear, cored and copped
1 1/2 inch ginger, peeled, minced
4-6 cups of veggie broth
Juice from 1/2 an orange
Salt, to taste
2 T maple syrup
1/4 cup heavy cream (optional)

Preheat the oven to 425ºF

Combine the spices and olive oil in a bowl.

Carefully peel the butternut squash.  Hold it firmly and slice off the ends so you have a flat edge.  Place a flat edge down and carefully slice the squash lengthwise.  Use a spoon to scoop the seeds and stringy pulp out and discard it.  That was the hardest part of this whole recipe.  Go have a drink.  You've earned it.

Chop the squash into 1 inch-ish chunks.  It's best to keep the pieces about the same size so they roast in the same amount of time.

Toss the squash chunks in half of the oil/spice blend, then spread the pieces on baking sheets lined with parchment paper.  Roast at 425ºF until pieces are tender - about 35 minutes.

While the squash is roasting, heat the remaining spice-oil in a large stock pot.  Add the shallots and brown them.  Add the carrots and celery and sauté them for 3 minutes or so.  Add the apple, pear and ginger and sauté for another 5 minutes, stirring once in a while.

Add the broth, cover and reduce the heat.  Allow to simmer until carrots are soft, then turn off the heat and stir in the roasted squash chunks.  Transfer the chunky soup to a food processor in small batches and process until smooth.

Add the orange juice, maple syrup and cream (if using) and adjust seasoning.

Wanna make it FANCY?!

Try this:

Slice off a few rings of shallots or grab a couple fresh sage leaves.  Toss them in some flour and fry them in just enough hot oil that they float a little.  They'll get nice and crispy plus they'll look really cool, and so will you.

Itsy Bitsy, Teeny Weenie, Little Dollop of Tahini

Now that you've undoubtedly ordered and received your Christmas present to yourself, let's break that bad boy in!
We're going to kick that addiction to store-bought hummus. You're better than that - or you will be in about 5 minutes.

OK, let's do this:

"Suck it, Sabra" Hummus
Makes 6 servings
Total time: 5 min

1 large clove of garlic
1 14oz can of garbanzo beans (same thing as chickpeas), drained, rinsed
Juice from 1 or 2 lemons
2 T water
1 1/2 T tahini
2 t ground cumin
1/4 t cayenne
1/4-1/3 c olive oil
salt, to taste


Combine all ingredients in your new food processor and process until smooth.

Too thick? Add more lemon juice, water or oil.

Too thin? Add a little more tahini

Put the hummus in a bowl and top with a little olive oil and cayenne. Serve with raw veggies and whole wheat pita.

Weekend Calorie Splurge: Poached Pears

It's a frigid 73ºF here in Los Angeles.  What better way to get all warm 'n' cozy than with cinnamon and red wine poached pears stuffed with vanilla mascarpone and candied walnuts?

"But Lanie J, I can't make that!  IT'S TOO FANCY!"

Bullshit.  I've got your back.
 

OK, let's do this:

Fancy Pants Cinnamon Poached Pears
Makes 8 servings
Prep time 5 min, cook time 30-40 min


For the pears:
4 firm pears - we're talking apple firm, people
1 bottle cheap red wine, new, not nasty almost vinegar wine (we'll use that for other stuff)
water
1 T ground cinnamon
1 t vanilla extract (splurge on the good kind)

For the filling:
8oz container of mascarpone cheese (available everywhere, even at Trader Joe's)
1 t vanilla extract
2 t agave nectar or maple syrup


For the topping
2 handfuls chopped walnuts
1 1/2 T sugar, agave nectar or maple syrup
1/2 t cinnamon



Peel the pears, but leave a little skin near the stems and butts.  Place them in a pot that holds all 4 without too much extra room.

Pour in the wine a little more than halfway.  Add water until the pot is almost full, but not so full it's going to boil over and make your stove a mess.  I believe in saving wine stains for your teeth.

Cover and bring to a boil, then remove cover and reduce to a strong simmer.  Allow to simmer for 30-40 minutes or until a fork can be easily inserted (but not so they're mushy).  If the pears float in the pot, you'll need to rotate them occasionally with a spoon.

Meanwhile, combine filling ingredients and set in the fridge until needed.

In a pan over medium heat add the topping ingredients all at once.  Stir continuously until walnuts are just toasted and coated with sugar about 2 minutes.  Remove them from the heat and set aside.

Once pears are done, cut them in half LENGTHWISE and place in the freezer for 10 minutes.
While the pears are cooling, dump out all but an inch of the poaching liquid and bring it back to a boil.  Allow it to simmer until it's reduced by at least half.  It will be syrupy.  That's good.

Once the pears are cool, use a spoon to scoop out the seeds and any chewy-looking internal stem thingies. Place tiny blob of the filling on a plate and set the pear on the blob.  This will keep the pear from sliding all over and ruining the look.

Next scoop a bigger blob of filling into the space you just scooped out of the pear. Sprinkle the candied walnuts on top.  Now for the fanciness.  Get a small spoonful of the syrup you made be reducing the wine.  Hold the spoon vertically so most of the syrup runs off back into the pot - you just want a tiny stream coming off the spoon.  Wave the spoon over the pear, drizzling the syrup like the artful master chef you are.

Change your life for less than $100

 

Buy this.  It's $29.95 on Amazon and ships for free. Mine's pink which makes everything taste better.

¡Holy Frijoles!

Don’t let the long list of ingredients scare you – it’s all normal stuff.  This Black Bean Soup is perfect for when you need to throw something together in a hurry but still want a hearty, healthy meal.

This recipe makes a lot of soup.  Store it in mason jars (or old pasta sauce jars) in the fridge or wait ’til it cools and store it in plastic in the freezer.  Never put hot food in plastic.  It’s gross and I wont be your friend anymore.

OK, let's do this:

Black Bean Soup
makes 8-10 servings
prep time: 5 min, cook time: 20 min

1 T sunflower or other high heat oil
1 1/2 cup onions, diced
1 heaping Tbsp ground cumin
1 T dried oregano
1 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 t salt
1/4 t cayenne (more or less depending on personal preference)
1/2 t fennel seeds
1/2cup carrots, diced
1/2cup celery, diced
1/2 zucchini, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 28oz can diced tomatoes (lightly drained)
4 cups vegetable stock
2 14oz cans black beans, drained, rinsed thoroughly
1/2 c chopped cilantro
1/2 c corn (frozen is fine)
1/4 c good olive oil

Heat oil in a large pot over high heat.  Add onions and cook until they’re translucent – about 3 min.
Add spices and stir to combine.

When the spices start to stick to the bottom of the pan, add the tomatoes and kind of scrape the bottom of the pot to get all the good toasty onion and spice bits off.

Add the veggie stock, carrots and celery and cover the pot.  When it begins to boil, turn the heat down to Med-high and add the zucchini, garlic.  Cover and allow the soup to gently boil until the carrots are tender, but not mushy – about 15 min.

When the carrots are tender, add the remaining ingredients (Black beans, corn, cilantro).  Allow to simmer for a couple minutes, then remove 1 or 2 cups of the soup and blend it, then stir it back into the pot.  This will thicken the soup.  If you have an immersion blender, that’s even better – run it for about 15 seconds.  If you’re using a regular blender, be careful with hot liquid…put a towel over the top.  If you have no blender, don’t stress – it will still be great, just broth-ier.

Garnish with a couple slices of avocado and a dollop of sour cream or shredded cheese.  Look at you, you sexy Soup Master!

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Look what Ana made!

"Oooh! I LOVE arugula!"

Arugula is awesome, but people treat it as if it's impossible to find or something.  People always gush over it.  That's because people are dumb.  You can use this to your advantage.

How to impress people in 3 easy steps:

1) Buy some arugula
2) Toss it with dressing
3) Put it on a plate

With quiche I like to add a little arugula salad.  Partly because it looks awesome and partly because I like to try to balance eating pie crust first thing in the morning.

Here's how to make a kick ass dressing in less than 1 minute.


OK, let's do this:

Kick Ass Dijon Dressing
makes 6 servings
total time: 1 min

3 T Dijon mustard
2 T Mayo
1 or 2 T olive oil, you can choose the consistency.  I'll let you.
1 T capers if you have them
salt and pepper to taste

Stir all ingredients together and toss over the arugula.  Save the extra in a little jar for a week or so.

Bonus: Put it on things like asparagus and broccolini and call it an "aioli," and pretend you're fancy!

Jay and Lynn Quiche

I always keep an emergency quiche in the house.  It's easy, delicious and you never know when you'll have a house full of tipsy, possibly stoned people that raid your kitchen and bitch because all you have is canned beans and mustard.

Now if you're one of those people, feel free to make your own pie dough, but know that you're wasting precious time that could be spent eating quiche and/or pie.  Trader Joe's and Whole Foods Market both make excellent frozen pie doughs that contain no preservatives.  Whole Foods even has organic and whole wheat options.

Jay and Lynn Quiche with broccolini and arugula covered in Kick Ass Dijon Dressing

OK, let's do this:

Jay and Lynn Quiche
Makes 8 servings unless you are Jay and Lynn, then it makes 2 giant servings.
Prep time: 8 min, Bake time 40 min



1 frozen pie dough, thawed in the fridge overnight or on the counter away from the dog for about and hour.
2 T olive oil
1/2 large red onion, diced (go ahead and chop the whole thing - you'll probably use it later) 
4 big handfuls of baby spinach
5 large eggs
1/3 cup mayonnaise (trust me on this)
2/3 cup shredded asiago cheese
handful of chives, chopped

salt and pepper, to taste

Heat a pan over med/high heat; add oil.

Drop one piece of onion in - if it sizzles, add the onion and cook 'til they brown.

Add the spinach and cook til it's dark green and wilty.

Remove from heat and drain by placing the mixture in a colander and pressing with a spatula.

Once the spinach has cooled for just a couple minutes, combine it with all the other filling ingredients and whisk with a fork for a minute.

Pour filling into the pie shell and use the whisking fork to stab the bottom of the pie shell a few times.

Bake at 375ºF for 40 minutes or until golden brown and not jiggly in the middle.

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Real life application:

Look what Lisa P. made!

"Made Lanie's stupid easy quiche for din! Sooooooo gooooood"

Let's get stupid.

Welcome to Stupid Easy!


What you'll find on here is a bunch of recipes that you can use to impress your friends and loved ones (and people you're trying to get into bed) with your seemingly mad culinary skills.  Oh, and you'll eat better in the process.

I've taken the art of cooking and - er - boiled it down to recipes anyone can follow.  Most recipes require only basic kitchen equipment and ingredients you can find without the aid of a sherpa.  We'll even utilize some things you can buy ready made.

You may notice I use terms like "handful" and "ish" a lot.  That's because sometimes measuring things is a waste of time and just creates another dirty dish.  If you're an accuracy freak, prepare to lose your mind.

On Stupid Easy you'll find recipes that contain whole, healthy ingredients without tasting like you need to wear patchouli and stop shaving.  They'll be easy to follow and sometimes I'll even show you how to plate it to really make you look talented.  Think of me as your kitchen wingman, baby.